Laser Falcon
The Laser Falcon sitting on the Mistress' arm in Tribute Day





First appearance

Tribute Day

The Laser Falcon is a falcon with the ability to kill with beams from its eyes. It has been the property of the Mistress. It is not known if it is the only one of its kind or if there are several Laser Falcons throughout the world.

About Laser FalconEdit


The Laser Falcon was originally given to Mistress as a gift from the Primate of Gar in the story Tribute Day. The Mistress liked it well enough to call off the assassin she had previously set on the Primate of Gar. Its laser-eye abilities were revealed in Bad Falcon, after Mistress instructed it to kill a large group of gnomes. To Mistress' disappointment, the Falcon cut the procedure short and eliminated the whole group in a moment with the beams from its eyes.

Finally, in A Capital Punishment, as Mistress was prepared to sexually torture a would-be assassin, the Falcon zapped the assassin prematurely. Deprived of her fun, Mistress had the guard give away her former pet for free.



The Laser Falcon killing a group of gnomes in Bad Falcon.

The Laser Falcon doesn't seem to ever want to move an inch. It responds to the word "kill" however and does without delay follow instructions to kill.


The Laser Falcon is brown and is a little bit taller than a human head. It often wear a kind of mask that probably is used to prevent it from killing when it is not meant to.

List of AppearancesEdit


  • The name Laser Falcon has never been used in the comic. It has however been referred to that by the authors on their Twitter account. It also says Laserfalcon! in the Alt-text to Bad Falcon. The name is likely a pun reffering to real life Lanner Falcons.